Hi-Ho, Hi-Ho, it's off to work I go.

So, here’s the scoop: it’s time for me to go back to work.  My doctor and I decided a couple of months ago that I would be ready at the beginning of July and here we are already, just under three weeks left to go.  I’m excited, anxious, happy and sad.  I spend my days thinking of what I will miss and what I won’t miss.  Here’s a snapshot of what’s been going through my mind lately:

Things I won’t miss while I’m at work:

·         The crazy-time my daughter has every afternoon.  She has a total freak-out because the jelly is on top of the peanut butter (imagine that!), she has to wait until October for her birthday (really nothing I can do there) and/or because she doesn’t want to ride her bike (but she really wants to ride her bike!!).  She’s three, she can’t help it but I certainly won’t miss it.

·         Meal planning.  When I first stopped working, it just made sense that the housework, meal –planning, and general household management would be my responsibility while my husband worked 40+ hours a week.  He definitely ended up doing more housework than he probably bargained for but the meal planning was all me.  And I hate it.  Hate it, hate it, hate it.  I’ll be glad to start sharing that responsibility again.

·         Strict budgeting.  My husband and I have definitely had to learn about making a budget (and sticking to it!) while I’ve been off work.  We plan to carry these newly acquired skills to our two-income living but adding a few frills here and there without sweating about it will definitely be a nice change.

Thing I’ll miss while I’m at work:

·         Lazy mornings.  It’s been great just having to get the kids ready and then getting myself into some clothes (any clothes), brushing my teeth and heading out the door.  No need to wash my face or brush my hair because I’m just walking to the school and back.  This will not be acceptable at the office.  It’s time to add a shower, blow-dry, hair straightening, make-up and office clothes back into our morning routine.  Ugh.

·         The one-on-one time I spend with my daughter every morning for the 2.5 hours my son is in school.  We shop together, run errands together or I just push her on the swings until my arms hurt.  I love that we have been able to share this time together.

·         Spending the day outside.  Do I really need to say more about this?  What’s worse, my office doesn’t have a window.  Boo.

·         Walking my kids to school and being a part of the school community.  I’ll be dropping them off with and picking them up from their daycare provider next year instead of the school.  I won’t have those daily interactions with their teachers or with the other parents.  Instead, I’ll be the mom depending on open house and parent-teacher nights to really get a good grasp of my kids’ education and school life.  This makes me sad.

This list could really go on forever and honestly, it goes without saying that I’m going to miss the time I spend with my kids the most.  Staying home with them every day for the last nine months has been tough but I’m already getting choked up knowing that in two weeks they’ll have to start sharing me with a full-time job again.  Hopefully, like everything else, this will be a lot harder for me than it is for them. 

My daughter just asked if we could make cookies.  Although it will likely result in a freak-out of epic proportions, I’m going to drop everything to do that with her now because in three weeks, I’ll be sitting in a windowless office, staring at photos of them and wishing we were baking cookies.  Maybe I’ll even be missing my daughter’s crazy-time and should include a photo of it on my desk as well.  Okay, maybe not.  That’s pushing the sentimentality just a little bit.